An Unhelpful Guide to Processing Feelings

When I was a child, people used to remark upon my extremely sunny disposition. Or so I would like to believe.

I have what I like to call a resting sad face, although it slides into the category of resting tired face quite frequently. Which occasionally causes people to exclaim, “what’s wrong?”. Nothing is wrong. It’s just my face.

The world puts a lot of pressure of individuals to be happy and look at the positive side of life. What if I don’t want to be happy? What if I want to wallow in a pit of self-destructive self-pity? There are a lot of articles on the internet regarding facing your life with a glass half full attitude. Sometimes, one just needs to say, “I know the glass is half full, but I would rather ignore it for some time as it is not half full of the liquid of my choice.”

Review: Biotique Bio Musk Root Hair Pack

Being Indian, you are expected to have three things: beautiful hair, a love for all things natural, and a digestive system strong enough for spicy food. I don’t have any of that. But what I do have is a lot of spare time, which I use to try out a lot of random things, and I already have a test subject desperate enough to go through all of it- me.

Biotique is an ayurvedic Indian brand that is 100% organic, vegetarian, preservative free, and they don’t test on animals. Every Indian’s dream, right? Other than marrying a tall, fair, slim, decent Brahmin girl or boy.

Let's Talk Lips

I live in a city where the weather is dry all the time, even our monsoons aren’t humid enough. In school, we used to carry around our little bottles of Vaseline that used to leak and ruin our bags, and lip balms made their first appearance in our town well into my teens. I used to think that a lip balm should be used only when my lips begin to crack, because of which I have tasted my own blood for way too long and laughed out loud with my mouth in the shape of a butt hole because if I smiled any wider than that, my lips would most certainly turn into the bloody version of Niagara Falls.

Around my fourteenth birthday, I decided that it is high time I started using something on my lips, mostly out of the fear that I might end up looking like the Mouth of Sauron. I started experimenting with whatever I had at home. Lip balms just seemed to sit on my lips, doing pretty much nothing. Ghee smells nice when used for cooking, not when it is constantly on your lips, right under your nose. The only thing that helped was my good old Vaseline.

As it turns out, there is a reason behind all this- your lips get used to the instant relief your lip balm provides and they stop building their own protective barrier, making you reapply even more balm, thus creating a vicious cycle of sorts. Basically, keep it simple, and you will be fine. 

Everyone’s lips react differently to different products- these are some of the things that worked for me:

Signs You are a “Grown Up”

It is my twenty-fifth birthday today, so I got to thinking about things that make you feel like you are an adult. When you are really a child masquerading as an adult.

1.     Your body craves vegetables.

2.     Troy and the girl are the villains of High School Musical who ruin Ryan and Sharpay’s dream that they worked so hard for.

3.     Every sweet makes you wonder, “will this be the thing that turns me into a diabetic?”

4.     Grocery shopping gives you an adrenaline rush.

5.     You disagree with Ariel that she is old enough to take her own decisions.

#MeToo: A Cheat Sheet

Systemic sexism, harassment and assault is unfortunately very common in the world. So common that it has been normalised to a point of “Eh, happens to everyone”. We have forgotten that this is not normal, and it makes me see red and I want to angry-punch a wall. You should too.

Activated Charcoal: One Woman's Dust is Another Woman's Favourite Skincare Ingredient

I love the colour black so much, that if I could, I would have an all-black wardrobe. Unfortunately, Indian weather does not agree with my sartorial choices. So, when I saw a charcoal mask video on YouTube, during one of my many post 12am internet surfing sessions, it drew me in mainly because it was a black mask. At that time, only a few charcoal based products were available in India, and the ones available were so costly that one might wonder if activated charcoal is actually code for black diamond dust. By now, everyone and their next door neighbour knows that over the past couple of years, activated charcoal went from being messy black powder to a very trendy ingredient that could be found in almost all products ranging from a facemask to cleansing juices. Yes, people do drink (and swear by) activated charcoal based drinks to “get rid of toxins”.

Being a poor college student, unable to lay my greedy paws on all these cool products, I got the next best thing that I could afford- activated charcoal capsules. I just crack them open, mix it up with random things, and slather the jet-black goo on my face. These are some of the masks that I have tried out (and loved) for over a year.

Jaipur, Rajasthan

Jaipur, popularly known as the Pink City, is the capital of Rajasthan- a western state in India. It is known for its rich history (and even richer food), jewellery, textiles and a vibrant culture. It is one of the biggest tourist destinations in India, owing to its sprawling forts and even bigger bazaars.

Now that I sufficiently sound like a ten-year old writing an essay about Jaipur, let us move on. Quickly.

I went to Rajasthan during the month of August a couple of years ago with my family and some family friends. I am not cool enough to travel with my own friends. Yes, I do have friends, thank you very much. I did want to post all these photos and knowledge gathered from the tour guides on my blog, but I forgot. I didn’t even listen to the tour guide properly because I was busy fidgeting with my camera and complaining about the heat and humidity.

Moti Dungri Fort and Birla Mandir

The Moti Dungri Fort sits on top of a hill, overlooking the Birla Mandir. It is a private residence, so no tourists are allowed inside, you can just look up at the fort, say ooh, take a photo and visit the Birla Mandir instead. The temple is a beautiful structure made of marble and stained-glass windows, you can go there to to admire the architecture and design even if you aren’t religiously inclined.

Moti Dungri Fort

Vichy Normaderm: A Fan Letter

Hello everyone,

Being unemployed has its own benefits (unless you lost your mind out of boredom in the first couple of months) especially if you have an internet connection. As everyone around you is working, getting married, having kids, travelling, generally excelling at life, you will find yourself changing your Wi-Fi’s name to ‘new best friend’.

During this time, my skin changed completely from a mischievous child to a raging hormonal teenager. This was almost entirely because of PCOS, which caused hormonal imbalance in my body and caused my skin to turn oily and breakout into a lovely cocktail of pustular and minor cystic acne- these mostly popped up along my jawline, cheekbone area, and forehead. I knew the reason for my acne so I decided not to go to a dermatologist and look for solutions online. I don’t recommend you do that but my mum is a doctor so, technically, I was under medical supervision as I did consult her on various ingredients that these products contained and if they were any good.

This is when I came across Vichy Laboratories, Vichy to its friends.

On Social Media. Alternate Title- Stop Hating on my Soulmate. Okay?

Hello everyone,

Fickleness of the world is never to be underrated. A few years ago, social media was denounced by the adult population of the world as the root of all evil. You fail your exam? Facebook's fault. You wear short dresses? Twitter is to be blamed. Want new clothes? Instagram has way too many fashion blogs. World War 3? Snapchat caused that. Most of these examples are obviously not accurate but they are also not far from the truth.

I Never Complain

Hello everyone,

Underneath a cool as a cucumber and youthful appearance, a twenty- something year old girl with no other work accepts that she is secretly a fossil. Very willingly, she told me about all of her complaints against the big, bad world as she offered me hard candy and cleaned her glasses.

How To Complete a Dissertation in a Week: A Foolproof Guide for a Dawdling Mind

Hello everyone,

I am not what you might call a stickler to deadlines and rules, procrastinate and escape is pretty much the motto I live by. So when it came to writing (and finishing) a full length dissertation, I knew that I was pretty much… something that rhymes with mucked. Our professors weren’t bothered with “original material” as long as we turned it in before the semester ended but our class decided to take the high road and submit non-plagiarized work.

The entire process was full of struggles such as explaining to my Department Head that I did not make up "Harry Potter" and "The Lord of the Rings" and that they are indeed real novels. Books were waved about, tempers flared and I emerged victorious.

Ha!

This is a how-to for the chronic put off-ers and the lag behind-ers, who will, for sure, not start on their dissertation till the very last, desperate moment:

Procrastination 101

Hello everyone,

My dissertation is due this week so obviously I decided to do everything other than sit and type the night away. Here are a few pointers which will help you reach your full potential, procrastination- wise.

On Femininity, Role Models and Kristen Stewart

“I have realized that you can close yourself off to life if you put walls up, but it’s a difficult thing. You can’t see over, people can’t see in, and you also can’t see out. So I’ve gotten quite comfortable with just being unafraid. I keep saying the same thing: it’s not about being fearless but really just embracing the fears and using them.”

-Kristen Stewart

Being a jeans and sneakers kind of a girl, even in 2014 and especially in you are in your 20’s, is considered as unfeminine and you get called a tomboy, more than a few thousand times. I have always been extremely shy and un-opinionated which makes me come across as a bit aloof. My friends grew into extroverted girly-girls and I waited patiently for that latent feminine gene in me to kick-start. I was the only girl left in my entire group who continued to dress outside the confines of stereotypical feminine style. While my friends were happily slapping on makeup and walking around in stilettos, I was still trying to figure out how to apply eyeliner without taking my eye out. Then a couple of years ago, all of that changed. I stopped trying to be what everyone else expected me to be and decided to be myself. Très cheesy, I know. What had caused that change? Kristen Stewart.

Poirot's Little Grey Cells

Hello everyone!

My first Agatha Cristie novel was the very famous, "Murder of Roger Ackroyd" which made me feel extremely naive and dippy. Anyone who has read that book will understand my feelings of being left out in the cold and subsequent trust issues related to other Agatha Christie novels. I have always loved mysteries and thrillers, although my love for the former almost eclipses other genres.

During my preteen and early teens, I was obsessed with reading Nancy Drew, and Hardy Boys. I have bought and borrowed many other thrillers, crime and mystery books by authors such as John Grisham, Robert Crais, Dan Brown, etc (very basic, I know) but it was Agatha Christie's novels that remained my favourite in this category. To me, the only close contender is JK Rowling's "The Cuckoo's Calling" and "The Silkworm".

Two Weeks of Nothing

Hello everyone!

Enthusiastic, outgoing, social, charming are just some of the adjectives that no one will ever use to describe me. If one does use such adjectives, he or she is either insane or has uncovered new depths of sarcasm. After an exceptionally long and dull fortnight, I stepped out of my house. I was kind of impressed with my short- term self imprisonment in the name of "won't-go-out-and-you-can't-make-me".

No, I am not depressed or miserable. Being alone isn't a scary thought for me because I find myself particularly delightful. I strongly believe that if you don't like your own company, you can't expect people to like you either.

This is what a bored girl does when her social life is lacking because she can't be bothered to put on pants:

Cayman Islands

The Caribbean Sea is a glittering beauty that takes you by surprise, leaving you gasping for breath. And pretty much in the middle of it is Grand Cayman, the largest of the three islands. It is a quaint little place- it is humid, expensive, has salty air, the restaurants are beyond lovely and every building has a unobstructed view of the expansive blue sea.

I went far out in the ocean on a boat to see bio-luminescence,  giggled as my sister tried to pick up a turtle at the turtle farm, saw different varieties of orchids at the botanic park and the sea... Oh! The sea. The best part was this- sea facing condo. I would wake up and there it was, the sea in all it's glory with the one funny little wave bobbing in the distance where it got stopped by the reef.

Bodden Town

On Feeling Like a Dumpling

Hello everyone!

When we are in our adolescence, we look and feel awkward and lumpy. A lucky few escape this stage and go straight from adorable to attractive. Let us ignore that particularly infuriating group. No, I mean the general human population, the sort that still hides their photographs from the age of 11 to 17.

Slight confusion, annoyance and an epiphany

A while back, I wrote an article for my college magazine (which I mentioned in one of my earlier posts). I thought it wasn't completely horrifying so I am sharing it here.

_______________________________________________________________________________

“She'd become an English major for the purest and dullest of reasons: because she loved to read.” 
― Jeffrey Eugenides, The Marriage Plot

From the time my father handed me Charles Dickens’ David Copperfield when I was ten years old, I have loved reading. I read everything. It didn’t matter whether Dickens was talking about the rampant industrialization or the moral degradation of England. I read it for the sake of reading. I liked how the characters felt like my friends and family. I liked that even though I had never been to England, I could clearly see the streets. I especially liked the fact that through a book, a mere novel, I could feel the pain of young David.

By the time I reached high school, I had read two of Chetan Bhagat’s novels which made me wonder- does today’s youth know the first thing about writing novels? After reading ridiculous “novels” churned out on a daily basis by IIT and IIM students I finally gave up on modern Indian novel. And I am not talking about writers like Arundhati Roy, I am talking about these young “novelists” who write God knows what and use long words and even longer sentences. Unfortunately, they come off as pretentious rather than artistic or clever.

On Long Distance Relationships

Long distance relationship, or as I like to call it- long distance perpetual headache, is a bitch. I happen to be in one right now so I know what I am on about. One can always spot those poor creatures, notice one or more of the following common habits or signs:

Welcome to my blog!

Hello everyone, and thank you for visiting my new blog!

This is the obligatory “get to know me” post. I am Gayatri Mulay, twenty-one years old and I have nothing better to do right now. I am doing my Masters in English Literature but you might notice my grammar is terrible. To the Grammar Nazis- I’m sorry. No one is probably even reading it. So basically, I am talking to myself.

Very busy and important